Road to A Level - Part I

It just doesn't make sense at all. It's been quite a lot of hard work, yet it is still not paying off. And I'm fast losing sleep and confidence that I'll ever hit 90 points at all. Everyday, there's just so much stuff to do, my time is no longer my own. Neither is my own body either.

These days, we keep getting hammered by so much motivational talk from teachers, from the Principal, from even outside speakers that the college has invited to speak with us during CT period. It's starting to make me feel much worse than the message that they're trying to across to us.

Do well in your A Levels! Don't give up! Don't stop! Don't slack! Don't waste anymore time! As if we didn't know this by this time already... The others can waste their time away by making noise during lectures, but the noise certainly didn't come from my class - everyone is so damn uptight about the exams that would ultimately determine which career path we go. Well, that's good news, for one, I guess.

Apparently, some, like me, have started to wake up and start the ball rolling to catch up on what we missed during the past semester, as well as JC1 work. It's tough, it's gruelling, and it certainly is emotionally draining. No more complaining - only frowning faces along the corridor, short tempers and sometimes even silence. Moreover, PE is physically draining - just yesterday we got sent into the gym, and having weak hands, I'm suffering from tricep aches every now and then. So much for all these people cheering when the lightning alarm sounded just before our timed 5km run.

As for all these motivational talk, frankly, I think it's starting to get counterproductive. Imagine the pressure to do well with more than 300 eyes(or pairs of eyes, go figure. It doesn't make a difference anyway.) fixed on your Mid Year, and later, the Prelims, result slip. Too much such motivation probably would get us somewhere, but it's certainly not right now. About high time they used reverse psychology, eh?

I think Mr Anuar's right. We're too pampered by the system.

It's draining on all levels however you look at it. Even with these, I've gotta stay strong for her sake...